Dining Out with Uncle Sam

I am dining downtown at a restaurant with cloth napkins, I raise a glass of crafted beer to toast Uncle Sam for taking me out.
“Thank you for giving back
some
of that money you took
from me
last year”

I just received my tax refund, and (I’m “Spilling while I’m sipping” because I’ve got Money to Blow…) as a true American patriot I am immediately donating the money to the suffering economy via large corporate retailers and restaurants who’s failure would have a significantly moderate impact on my daily affairs.
(I also paid my fiancée for my half of the last two months rent but that is not as glamorous as the previous and I just spent the last 12 hours at the gate of a construction site checking in people who bring home more bacon than I do so I am hording all the glamour points I can counterfeit because they don’t grow on the trees in my backyard.)

Here is the breakdown-
I have a car: +2 Glamour Points
But it is a 1996 Subaru Outback station wagon: -1 GP
with a tape deck: -1 GP
I have a tattoo: +1 GP
of a 1984 book quote: -1 GP
I have a job: +1 GP
as a rent-a-cop: -34 GP

Total = -33 Glamour Points